Finding my goal weight

With losing weight, you usually have a number in mind that is your “goal” weight. This number may change throughout the years (as it has for me) but there is usually always some magical number you have in your head where it is your “ideal” weight. Although, when I started out losing weight, I didn’t have a number in mind. I just knew that I weighed too much because I was having to buy larger and larger clothes and was low energy every day. I would be out of breath doing everyday things like walking up the stairs. I knew I needed to lose weight but didn’t have a “goal” weight in mind until later in my process.

After my first 40lb weight loss, I started shifting around my calorie intake to account for my new weight and start eating based on the weight I wanted to be. To determine what that weight was, I did a BMI calculator. I was shocked to see that my healthy weight range had a 40lb range! That seems huge! I’ve read a lot of about BMI and how it is more of a guidance than anything because of various genetics, body types, etc. You always hear the stories about how Adrian Peterson (for example) is overweight according to the BMI, which is obviously incorrect. That is where I think the BMI should be used as guidance for the average person. The fact that I have a 40lb range in what a healthy weight for myself is, just shows that they don’t really know what that magical number is.

When I finally reached the high end of my healthy weight range, I felt good about that. I felt that I could maintain that without having to starve myself every day so I kept in that range for a year or so.

Then I decided I wasn’t happy with that number anymore. I felt that I was too close to the overweight range that if I had a weekend of eating out or a holiday, I would inch close to that number and that was my “scary” space back to obesity. To be honest, since I lost weight, I have a huge fear of gaining it all back. So being too close to the overweight range for BMI kept me on edge.

I did a few things to jumpstart my weight loss again: I started lifting weights and I started doing daily calorie variations. I would go from eating 1200 calories one day to 1800 calories on the next day to keep my body guessing. This helped to get down another 8lbs. From there, I felt better about my weight and felt like it was something I could maintain. I started getting comments that I looked “skinny” which I hadn’t heard since I was like 12 years old (I wasn’t going for skinny, I was going for healthy).

Then we started to try to get pregnant and I stopped the calorie counting. We were lucky and got pregnant right away but by that time I was eating more because I thought I needed to for the baby. It was an interesting experience because I wasn’t sure of how to eat “normal” since I had been calorie counting for so long so I quickly gained 5-10lbs in the beginning of my pregnancy (also because I could only stomach eating carbs). By the end of my pregnancy, I gained around 40lbs.

It took me 9 months to lose those full 40lbs from after I had my first child. I started to calorie count again and started walking consistently each morning for 20-30 minutes with evening family walks some nights. I also was practicing yoga 2-3 times per week. I didn’t lift a single weight but I slowly got into my most toned shape I had ever been in. Then I had an interesting thing happen where my body started losing additional weight even though I stopped calorie counting. It was the culmination of everything I had been working for and I ended up getting to my lowest weight since I was 14 years old (FYI I am a similar height to what I was at 14). I felt great and happy in my body. I was just above the middle area of my 40lb healthy weight range of my BMI. I couldn’t imagine losing another 20lbs at that point and still be considered a “healthy” weight but according to BMI, that was possible.

Then I found when I started to try to get pregnant again, I quickly gained 5-10 lbs and ended up gaining about 45lb my second pregnancy. I once again lost about 40lbs after 9 months of having my second child but that last 5lb has stuck on me. I haven’t been able to shake it. I know I could if I truly focused on it but I just haven’t had the willpower and energy to do so and I’m OK with that. This may just be my new “normal” for weight. With two girls under 5, a demanding job, side gig job, yoga teacher training and just all things of life, I can’t muster up the extra willpower for me not to eat that extra handful of almonds before bed or to indulge in the donut that is leftover from a meeting at the agency I work for (sweets are my major weakness). I think I will get the willpower back as my child begins to sleep more consistently through the night, I learn how to eat healthy while traveling for work, learn how to avoid the donuts at the agency and bring more focus on to my workouts. I have faith that I will get there.

The fact that I’m not there right now though, I have been totally OK with. For me, it is always nice to have a goal to work towards because it keeps me motivated to continue on the path of healthy eating and exercise to remain healthy so I have the energy to chase my kids around.

Ryan and I are actually talking about doing a “reset” for ourselves after a trip in March. We’ve spoken about trying intermittent fasting or eating more less often, some of the diet crazes that are out there right now. Sometimes it is just fun to try new things to keep it interesting. If it impacts you in a negative way, then quit with no regrets. And if it works, well then that’s great! I will write about whatever we decide to do.

How did you find your goal weight or are you still searching for it?